current pet peeves AKA things that make me go "WHAT!?!"

1. THE DOUBLE DOWN "SANDWICH" FROM KFC

What's wrong with a sandwich, you ask? The fact that it is not actually a sandwich, and is actually this:

source

Are you kidding me?! Apparently, cheese and bacon smushed between two pieces of chicken qualifies as a sandwich. Are you ASKING to die a terrible, artery clogged death? One more thing...can this even taste good? I mean, I like chicken, I like cheese, and I like bacon. But put them together, all three protein, with nothing else? It sounds disgusting to me. I'm just sayin'.

2. HAVING TO READ LANGUAGE ARTS TESTS OUTLOUD


Indeed, end of the year testing is in full swing. For the past few weeks I've been providing accommodations for ELL and Resource students at work. Don't get me wrong, it's not the reading out loud part I have a problem with. In fact, I enjoy it one hundred times more than sitting and listening to a kid read the test to me. The part I hate is when I  have to read things like this:

Which is the correct way to write sentence 13?

A. I goed to the store yesterday.

B. I did gone to the store yesterday.

C. I has went to the store yesterday.

D. I went to the store yesterday.

Seriously? It's unethical to read the questions in such a way that the student can tell what the right answer is, but unless they allow us to preview the tests and be prepared, how can I read these and not stumble over the poor grammar? Try it. Try reading this out loud without pausing because it sounds so funny. Yuck.

3. SONG LYRICS

Let me just give you a few examples, and keep in mind it's not necessarily the singer, but the lyrics I can't stand.

Example A comes from the current teenage heartthrob of the moment, Justin Bieber's song Eenie Meenie featuring Sean Kingston. This is, in fact, the opening line of the song.

She's indecisive - she can't decide.

Alright, alright. Maybe America isn't quite as bright as it could be, but seriously? Do you really need to explain indecisive? But wait! It gets better. A few lines later...

You can't make up your mind, mind, mind, mind, mind...

Okay. I didn't know what indecisive meant. I was still a little confused after you told me that she couldn't decide, but now it's all cleared up. Indecisive means that you can't make up your mind. Oh, excuse me. Your mind, mind, mind, mind, mind.

Example B I'll leave to Rob Paravonian to explain (ps if you haven't seen his Pachelbel Rant, check it out - it's hilarious). This comedic singer delves into the "deep" lyrics of the Friends theme song. If you watch this, only watch until about 1:30. The second set of lyrics he analyzes is...well...risqué. I love that word.

Of course there are many more examples. I can hardly even stand to listen to the radio these days. But, dear reader, I've decided to bore you no longer. Especially if you've actually read everything up until this point. That's commitment. :)

Thanks for letting me rant. I'm a ranter. The end.